arewethereyet

Good news everyone - I got the job! I’ll begin as an account executive in about 10 days. That gives me time to get some of my Easter walking in and to buy some new work pants. I’m definitely going to need to buy some new clothes for this gig. And I deserve them! Anyway, I’m excited to call this period of unemployment done. The only thing hanging in the balance is the background check. It’s a formality - I guess they are looking to see if I’ve lied on my application (which I haven’t) or been arrested recently (I haven’t - actually I’ve never been arrested now that I’m thinking of it lol). They are also checking my credit rating. Glad this long period of unemployment hasn’t caused me to default on any financial obligations! So anyway, woo hoo. Happy me.

I’ve been doing a pretty decent job on my walking this week. I’ve done 7 miles in the last 2 days, plus an hour with Claire. I plan to do more again tomorrow. I tell ya, 2008 has been hard for me to keep up with the exercise plan. I think it’s because of the series of physical issues (the back injury and the bronchitis being at the top of the list) and the flurry of activity on the job front. And now that I’ll be working again it’s not going to get any easier. I’ve made an important decision - I’m going to change gyms. That means losing Claire (as a trainer, not as a friend!) but frankly I can’t keep a pricey membership at a gym 11 miles from my house and 25 miles from my job and hope to actually use it enough. So I’m going to be looking at 3 new places - we have a Bally’s and an Xsport Fitness within a mile of the house, and I’m also going to check out the local YMCA. I don’t think the hours at the Y will meet my needs but I’m still going to check it out. We’ve also been shopping for treadmills. I have major jealousy of all you with them in your houses and I really want one here so I don’t have to leave the house to get some walking in. That said, I know I am motivated by the social nature of the gym experience so I am leaning towards that route. So much to think about. Damn this working thing.

I made gluten free pizza for dinner tonight - with goat cheese and turkey sausage on my part. Yummy. I also had a salad like a good girl. No worries.

Hope all is well with everyone. I’m going to call it a night… the snoring has died down in the other room so I think I might just be able to sleep! Hugs to all, XO Ellen

Well it’s been a long and interesting day so far, and it’s not even half over yet I fear. So let’s start with the news that I think a number of my buddies are looking for… my meeting this morning went very well. I received a ’soft offer’ from the hiring manager and was sent on my way to ponder that overnight. He will call me tomorrow, or Monday latest, with the actual offer, presuming I want one, which I do. (Getting a job is very complicated, you know?) I came home very happy (and btw I was back in the house by 9am so you know it was an early meeting) and made a few phone calls. Found out that the other job that I thought I’d be getting an offer to was GONE. They extended an offer to another candidate, who accepted it. So that’s that, I’m expecting to accept an offer to work for MDR, a division of Dun & Bradstreet, tomorrow. I’ll be a National Account Executive so perhaps I’ll be jetting to a city near you!

Other news. Had lunch with my gluten-free longest friendship of my life pal Betsy. We literally were in a playpen together. She’s awesome. She’s very emotional today and burst into tears several times while we were talking about life, love, and all that good stuff. It’s funny. She’s always been the sap, I’ve always been the stalwart. Some things never change! But we went to this place called Ted’s - they have an amazing gluten-free menu - and we ordered the same thing we did last time…. house salads (no croutons), bison burgers wrapped in lettuce instead of buns, and french fries which are gluten-free (btw, not all fries are gluten-free… who knew?) Anyway, we just gabbed and talked and caught up and it was great. I ate the entire salad, the entire burger, and about 10 fries. Just a delicious lunch. And a ton of fun.

Then I went shopping for a V-Day gift for Tim. I realized that I needed to get him something when my mom asked me what I was getting and I didn’t feel comfortable saying “me in a sexy negligee.” Figured he should have something to show for it. So I got him a grilling cookbook and a picture frame that says “Love” on it. And me in a sexy negligee - don’t tell mom! We are celebrating V-Day tomorrow. I have school tonight and as you can see my day has been quite long already. It’s funny how this year when I have a Valentine, the day isn’t monumental for me. Why was it so monumental when I was alone? Anyway, the important thing is celebrating the love, not celebrating it on the day. We are going on a romantic date downtown to a French Thai restaurant. Should be wonderful.

And with that I must fly. I have reading to do before class and I’m so tired it’s going to take me a very very very long time! Hugs to all, and Happy Valentine’s Day. XO Ellen

Oh wait! I promised you a rant! Well here it is. You know how I got that amazing suit on sale at Macy’s last week? Well I wore it today and I felt great in it so I decided that I’d go suit shopping again at Macy’s, albeit a different one. Macy’s recently took over Marshall Field’s here, much to everyone’s chagrin, and I knew that particular Marshall Field’s well. I walked directly into the door that would have put me in the expansive plus-sized section and it wasn’t there. Instead I found teeny-bopper bathing suits. Hardly what I was looking for. I saw an arrow pointing to the Women’s section and so I followed it. Walked the entire floor to be shown a sign that said, “Women’s 14W-24W has been moved to the Lower Level.” Then I got downstairs and I was already so hopping mad that I wasn’t poised to like anything anyway but they had no suits! Just some junky play clothes. Is it me? Have you noticed how they tuck plus-sizes away in the corner? Away from noise, people… away from being seen? I mean you guys know I’m on the cusp between departments now - should I have to go between 2 or 3 floors to see if the 1X jacket is a better fit for me than the Ladies XL? I mean, it’s ridiculous. I’ve always felt hidden away, like a dirty secret, when I’ve shopped in these sections. This particular Marshall Field’s I loved because it was prominent and I just loved what they had. And now, NOTHING. It’s ridiculous. So I’m absolutely boycotting that particular Macy’s and after I go through their downtown location one last time I may boycott them all. Bastages.

Dear Universe,

Thank you for my gift on the scale this morning. I don’t know how to explain a 1/2 pound loss with only 2 days of cardio and one day of weight training, and multiple examples of me cheating on my diet. Thank you for showing me that you can be merciful, even when I haven’t earned it.

Thank you also for the plethora of nonscale victories this week. Thank you for the new size 14W suit that fit me off the rack, no alterations, that was on sale for 160 bucks. Thank you for the Coldwater Creek shopping day when you showed me that I cannot wear a 1X anymore no matter how often I try to put them on. Thank you for the gigantic “NORDIC TRACK” sign in Sears - if we hadn’t been standing at that dumb PageComm kiosk at the mall for so long yesterday I would have gotten my run in, but instead I saw that sign and I found out that I can get a really nice treadmill (one that my 203.5 pound frame can run on well) for 800 bucks. Thank you for the insane number of compliments I received last night at the fundraiser - I thought I looked cute enough in my jeans and sparkly stretch shirt but apparently I also looked downright skinny. I must remember to wear that again soon.

Thank you for the people in my life. Thank you for the patience of my cousin Annie, who is the one who made me buy that shirt I wore last night, and is the one who sat there in the Nordstrom dressing room saying “no that doesn’t fit, no that’s too big, no that’s not your size” until I heard her. Thank you for the love in my life who springs out of bed in the morning to make me coffee and oatmeal, carefully slicing half a banana and layering sprinkles of cinnamon sugar throughout. Thank you for the support of family and friends throughout the unemployment drama of the last 8 months. I sense it is coming to an end now, which I thank you for as well, but I know I never would have made it without that support. And thank you for sending me to BuddySlim where I have found the motivation to continue my weight loss journey during this period of unemployment, a situation which I know would have made me eat and eat and eat in the past.

When I look at all my blessings, Universe, I know that I am not doing my part. It is time for me to step up and give back to you. I need to take this one-day-at-a-time. This week I promise you that I will give my body nourishing food and take my supplements religiously because I respect my body as you respect me. This week I will move my body whenever and wherever I can. I will go to the gym and on days when it is too cold or too snowy or too whatever I will move my body at home. I will put on an exercise DVD or I will put on my iPod and dance until I drop. My body craves that workout, and I will give into that craving as much often as I can. This week I will get the sleep my body craves so it can perform the way I know it can and I know it wants to. This week I will smile at strangers and reach out to friends because I know you have put each person in my personal Universe for a reason and I gain so much from those interactions.

Well Universe, I need to head out now. I stepped off the scale and put on my workout clothes. I’m off to the gym, as promised. My organic gluten-free waffles are toasting away and I can smell them from here. Yummmmm. I’ll stop at DD for the coffee since my boy decided to go back to his place last night in order to avoid that fundraiser. *wink*

Thank you again for all you have done for me. I am blessed. And I know it.

Yours humbly, Ellen

Haven’t we all heard that one? Shopping for clothes and being sent to the fat girl section? Ugh. Today was the first time I was floored by that statement in a positive way. I was shopping in the fat girl section (of Nordstrom) only to find out that their 14W’s are now too big, at least in pants. My goodness I carry my weight up top, but I digress. So that’s what the lady said to me in the dressing room, looking at the absurd roominess of the slacks I was trying on. “You need to go to the other section, dear.” Wow, talk about a non-scale victory. Even more shocking was I went to the regular size zone and they didn’t look alarmed at seeing me there. No one asked me who I was shopping for. They just asked me if they could help me. I bought a sweater that was on sale. It was an XL, but a regular girl’s XL. I’m a bit thrown off by the whole experience. In a good way but I’m definitely living with funhouse mirrors of my body. I wonder when I’ll see myself as others see me. I suspect it’s a long-time coming.

My quest to Onederland is slow. Very very slow. But I’m getting there. My personal goal is to get there in February. And yes I realize that’s like 1 pound a week and I should probably set my sights a little higher but I just want to keep moving along this trajectory to Onederland. I’m trying to enjoy the journey. I think I may be enjoying it too much - the destination just isn’t that far away and yet I plod along. Ho-hum. It’s been hard to get in enough exercise the last few weeks - weather, interviews, and some health drama had the better of me for a bit - but I’m still working out several days a week (4?) and every time I do I think “I need to make more time for this again!” What I really need is a treadmill here at the house. But then I’d have to think of another excuse.

I had 3 very good interviews this week - I can see at least 2 of them moving forward. I hope I hope I hope. Today’s was for an amazing job that I would love to do. The money isn’t as terrific as I’d hoped it would be but the job would be so gratifying, and the experience would be worth it. The other 2 jobs pay boatloads… I’m just not sure if I want them at the same level as the one I interviewed for today. That said, it’s tough to turn down boatloads of cash, particularly when you’ve been without an income as long as I’ve been without one now. Ugh.

Anyway, I am clearly just rambling. I just wanted to share my nonscale victory and wish everyone a very very happy February. And so it goes. Hugs to all, Ellen

Friends,

Good weight news to report. I am down 2 pounds this week and have achieved my last mini-goal in the 200s! I just reset the ticker and have placed my next mini-goal at 6 pounds from now… 198. That is a number I haven’t seen in 15 years. Maybe more. I remember 199 about 15 years ago. I don’t know if I ever saw 198. Anyway, holy cow! This is big! And I’m getting smaller.

Another bizarro-world NSV for the week…  I had my annual mammogram. (Kevin, you can skip this paragraph if you want to!) In previous years they have had to do use 6 plates to take the full impression. I’m proud to say that this year they only needed the standard 4 plates. I’ve lost that much breast tissue - can you believe how happy I am about smaller boobs? But I come to the table (and to the shopping mall, and to church, and to everywhere) with impressive assets shall we say so I’m THRILLED to know end about this NSV.

Workouts with Claire went well this week and I did cardio every day except Wednesday. Today I plan to take a walk outside while someone is watching football. I love football. Love love love it. But I need a walk and it’s a good way to get some me-time. It’s funny, my mom started walking 2 miles every morning before work - I think exercise was secondary to her need for some alone time. She’s skinny as a rail, as always, and she still does it to this day. And she’s been retired for 15 years. I’ve met my father. A lovely man. And I’d go for a 2-mile walk every day to get some alone time too if I were living with him day in and day out!!!

Only negative of the week I can think about is insomnia hell but I think that has to do with 2 big things… job search stress (more activity this week, nothing huge but at least something is going on) and a new medication that a friend gave me to relax my back. It’s working but it seems to loosen  me up and somehow rev me up at the same time. Lesson learned - it’s a daytime med for me, not an overnight one!

So that’s my Saturday report. Good weigh in, bad sleeping. Rock on with your bad selves and let’s all try to think and talk as nicely to ourselves this week as we would about a good friend or to a stranger on the street. We are fabulous! Big hugs to all, Ellen

I added these to my profile as well but just wanted to share 2 cute pics of Tim and me on New Year’s Eve. Awwww!

Scale was down this morning, but of course it doesn’t count until Saturday. I’m very excited to see a loss this week. I walked to Walgreen’s to pick the photos up - just over 3 miles round trip. How blessed is Chicago to see 60 degree weather in January! Just what the doctor ordered. It felt great to stretch the legs, but I promise I didn’t overdo it.  I’m doing well on food today - chicken/cognac/cranberry sausage for breakfast, a small roast beef sandwich for lunch, and a big veggie salad for dinner. I expect a banana as a snack in there as well.

Hugs to all! Ellen

Hi all. Well it’s been a few weeks since I last blogged… a busy few weeks. (Karen: I know I know I know. I’m sorry.)

Let’s start with my weight loss, since you know this is BS after all: there is none. Luckily there’s just a pesky 1 pound gain over the indulgent holidays which involved cocktails and gluten (heaven forbid!) and the occasional bout of dairy besides. I’ve done well in terms of managing the overall calories but I definitely need to get back on the bandwagon, which btw I am doing officially tomorrow and frankly I am looking forward to it. I know I’m off my game because seriously… I am very very very hungry lately. And all that can mean is that my body is used to being indulged and it also means that my workouts have been slack.

Which is true. But not because I want them to be. It’s because I earned myself a major injury on Christmas Eve.  Long story short, I walked headfirst into the cross bar of my cousin’s handicapped van, flung my neck all the way back (whiplash), and knocked myself out cold for a few seconds. I did a paralysis check upon regaining consciousness - all systems go, and painful. Basically since then I have been fighting a back spasm, from my middle to lower back… it moves. And I can’t run, and I can’t lift. I’m seeing the chiropractor a little more often and Claire and I are doing a lot of stretching and body weight only exercising. I’m icing my back daily too, but I find it difficult to sit at the computer for very long these days. I actually didn’t come on at all for about a week believe it or not. That’s a major change for me believe me! Anyway, I appear to be on the mend. This week I have pledged to my fellow Hot Rods that I will do light cardio (treadmill or ellyptical) every day. No running for me until I have 5 painfree days in a row. And believe me when I say I am a ways away from that accomplishment. (Ugh)

Drama earlier tonight - the computer completely crashed and looked to be kaput for real for a while there. The Dell guy wanted to reinstall XP, and wipe out 4 years of work. Here’s my word to wise: BACK UP YOUR FILES TODAY! DON’T WAIT UNTIL SOMETHING BAD HAPPENS! When I got back to working, I immediately saved all my documents and everything on my desktop. I’m still searching for my iTunes files so I can grab the music onto CDs just in case I lose it all again. It’s a nightmare folks, so please please please back up your files!!

Love remains grand. We had a wonderful romantic time in Lake Geneva for New Year’s Eve. And we took pictures which I’m picking up from Walgreens tomorrow and yes I’ll scan one of them in so you can see how cute we are! We’re planning our Florida trip for the end of March.  This is the real deal folks… I’m still a bit stunned but it is the real deal.

And that’s it for now. I promise (Karen) not to be so long between blogs. XO to all and continued love & success in 2008 to all, Ellen

I am having one helluva day. Some of it good, some of it not-so-good. But I’ve decided to concentrate on the good and I want to share it with you all.

First off, I’ve had  2 people tell me “you look REALLY different” and they meant my face and not my body. And they meant it in a good way - almost like “I can tell you’ve lost weight but wow the difference in your face is really noticeable.”

And my chiropractor who I haven’t seen in a month now said, “WOW! How much weight have you lost?” So the change continues to be noticeable.

And I played with my goddaughter today for several hours and she’s a piece of work. I gave her a holiday gift on Wednesday - an adorable raincoat that looks like a lady bug, which matches a very well-received umbrella I sent her about a year ago - and she took one look at it and said in her very British accent, “Aunt Ellen, I’m not very interested in this.” Hilarious. She repeated it. I nodded and said, “Okay honey. I can live with that.” But she loved the 5 dollar stuffed moose I brought her and can’t sleep without it now so I guess that’s a plus. And we’re great friends when it comes to make believe and the dollhouse. She’s as girly a girl as I am. Hooray!

And lastly, my boyfriend just called to tell me he’s in love with me. Now he’s been at a holiday party so we’ll see if he regrets it tomorrow, but OMG my boyfriend loves me. And I’m pretty sure I love him too.

Such a crazy day, and the last thing I expected to hear tonight. But it ends the day on a lovely high note which I needed.

Big hugs to all, and to all a good  night. XO ELLEN

I’m so proud of myself! This week at the gym I achieved 2 personal bests:

1. On Tuesday I ran 3 miles in 39:25. So I can officially do a 5K now, and I beat the 40 minute mark, which is easily a personal best!

2. Today I ran 1 mile in 12:08. That’s doing a mile at 5.0mph, and for me that’s flying! So I can do it! I can run faster and faster. I don’t think I’ll ever get below 10 minute miles… and I’m a helluva long way from that now… but I’m proud that at 42, I am in good enough shape that I can improve my time over and over again. A few months ago even I was having trouble getting below 15 minutes for a mile. This is a major improvement and I’m proud!

I’ve eaten Chinese food almost every day this week so far. It’s so weird - everyone is serving…

Sat: Tim and I ordered Chinese food.

Sun: I ate leftovers.

Mon: No chinese

Tuesday: Thai for lunch, Chinese for dinner at a presentation

Wednesday: Chinese and sushi for dinner with my family that is in from the UK

Thursday, that’s today: Leftovers from Tuesday.

I’m so sick of the far east right now it’s crazy. On the plus side, I’ve managed to stay away from the pot stickers and the egg rolls and stuff like that. I know it’s still bad for me but I’m consoling myself with that achievement. LOL  Hopefully I’m not doing too much scale damage, but I think I probably am.

Is it the new year yet? Even though the no gluten-diet helps me avoid the cookie temptation, I’ve got to tell you I’m seriously tired of eating. Must get back to normal.

Hugs to all! Ellen

Short blog, but I have to post it because I’m just so happy about it! My doctor called and my cholesterol is down. We’re still not normal but we’re getting there. Down 25 points, unmedicated, since she tested it this Spring. I have a strong family history of cholesterol issues so this is a  major personal victory. And oddly enough I did it by eating red meat and cutting out the wheat and dairy - eat right for your blood type. I swear as much as I think it’s gimmicky, I do believe that my body works better all the way around when I eat like this.

Off to the gym to work out with Claire. Tick tock. Time’s a wasting. Hugs! Ellen